Looking forward

I am 24 years old now: a mere child among my coworkers, and an infant among my aspirations.

I graduated from Boston University in 2004 with a BA in both Psychology and Philosophy- a major chosen more out of amusement and momentary interest rather than lasting career-choice. Since then, my efforts and thoughts have rested heavily on medicine. I became an EMT-B during my Junior year at BU, convinced by my roomate Rich that it was both exciting and profitable. He was only half lying.

I have come to love the job, and with it- medicine. My aim has since been set higher towards dreams of becoming a Doctor, something I wrestle with constantly as the reality of my academic history and the contrasting demands of medical school are more sharply drawn to focus. Since my graduation from BU I have worked as an EMT in a fairly large urban city, while at the same time bumbled through a post-bacc approach to finishing pre-med science requirements.

Almost a year ago now I decided to attend paramedic school. I wanted *more* medicine. I told myself that this would truly help me decide about medical school (as I have wavered much on the subject), and that it would be fun in the process. I was frustrated as an EMT, knowing enough only to know that I knew nothing, and worse that I could usually DO nothing... made me angry and unhappy at work. Deciding to become a paramedic has refocused my interest in medicine (and medical school), as well as given me solace as to my patient care. Soon, I say. Soon I will be able to make people better.

Currently I am about to start the very last portion of paramedic school: the internship "ride time" period. Over the next month and a half I am scheduled to ride as a third on three different ambulance services, all the while behaving as an actual paramedic: performing assessments, making clinical decisions, and- finally!- treating patients based on my knowledge. Needless to say I am very excited. I have spent 10 months listening to lectures, passing through clinical rotations, and taking exam after exam after exam. Finally I get my chance to test my knowledge and understanding with real patients, in real situations. The prospect has made many of my classmates nervous, but today - still five days away from my first rotation - the excitement has yet to allow another emotion in.


I have created this blog as a means to both document my progress through this process, as well as to - I hope - provide real experience and first-hand insight into those who may be going through the same thing. I also redially admit that I have been heavily influenced by the writings of Mr. Peter Canning, a long-time paramedic who has a blog here on Blogger, has written two books about his own experiences, and also happens to work for the same ambulance service I do. I have a lot of respect for Mr. Canning both as a paramedic and as a writer. I find his words not only heavy with experience (as they are), but also saturated with an interest in the field that we dont seem to see often these days. He looks through medicine into people, a view that I believe serves him clinically, intellectually, and literally- as a writer. To you, Mr. Canning, I tip my hat sir.

Tonight I go to bed. When I wake up, four days will stand between me and my first patient as a paramedic.